The Grammys

So now that we've all had a day to get over our shock and awe (or disappointment and boredom), I'll recap the Grammys from my perspective.  Also, just so you know, this is from memory so it is almost certain to be out of order and disjointed.  Enjoy.

LL Cool J hosted this year.  Ah, LL...I remember him back in the day, back in the "Knock You Out" days when he was oh-so-fine (and really, he still is) and I was oh-so-young (and really, I still act like I am).  He was rocking a velvet suit and I do mean rocking it.  I'm not sure I approved of the prayer at the beginning...don't we have some kind of separation of church and Grammys in this country?  Well, if we do, Nicki Minaj missed that memo.  And speaking of - what the fuck was that??  Did you see her "performance"?  I wasn't a big Nicki Minaj fan to begin with, now I'm not one at all.  That was the most pointless, attention-whore bunch of crap I've seen since Madonna played the Super Bowl (or the last time Lady Gaga was on stage).

Now that I brought Lady Gaga into this (despite her total irrelevance last night), what in the hell was she wearing last night??  Did she get confused while trying to put on her fishnets and just left them over her head?  What was with the giant stick?  Was she talking softly while she carried it or is she a majorette now?  Who knows with her.  She is obviously bat shit crazy.  The most hilarious part of her entire ensemble was the fact that someone thought it would be a good plan to have her wear it while sitting next to Miranda Lambert.  Mrs. Blake Shelton might be a wild and crazy girl, but she seems reserved and very un-Gaga (that's a compliment, by the way) and I felt sorry for her having to sit next to that hot mess.  At least there was no raw meat involved this time.

On to the performances...Bruno Mars rocked it.  I bet his shows are a crap ton of fun to attend.  He's always just a ball of energy on stage and looks like he's having a blast.  I also enjoyed Foo Fighters' performances, although I found the addition of the Mouse Dude a little disconcerting.  There was something off about following Dave's awesome acceptance speech about it being about the head and the heart and the human with a David Guetta/Deadmau5 performance, you know? 

I didn't watch Taylor Swift perform...mostly because she makes me puke and I have the power of fast forward.  I did watch The Band Perry, Blake Shelton and Glen Campbell though and that was good. The Civil Wars were excellent too, which is pretty much to be expected from those two.  I thought Jennifer Hudson did a great job (especially since she couldn't have had too long to prepare) and Alicia Keys and  Bonnie Raitt made a fine showing.  I fast forwarded through Chris Brown's bullshit (both times), but I watched Rhianna...mostly because my husband and I were pondering if she had lost weight because her ass seems to have completely disappeared which really is a shame.  I watched a couple minutes of Coldplay, only to try and put my finger on why I dislike them so much.  I can't decide, I think it's just because they suck.

I cheered out loud when Foo Fighters won and I booed when they lost.  Sure, Adele's album was fine, her voice is beautiful, blah, blah, blah, but I LOVE Wasting Light and Doo-Wops & Hooligans, so if I had been picking winners, she would have done more sitting and less crying on stage.  Her performance was one to be proud of though.  She seemed kind of nervous but she worked that shit out.  And she looked great - her eyelashes were ridiculous!  I must have some.  Now that I have somehow wandered over to makeup choices - what was happening with Carrie Underwood's eyelashes?  She is so gorgeous, her hair, her dress, it was all perfection - except those crazy looking spider eyelashes.  Gah.

So yeah, that's about it.  I have a standard awards show procedure: I record it, then about an hour or so after it starts I start watching the recording so I can fast forward through commercials and things that suck.  I started watching about 9:20pm and by 11:00 I was caught up.  There was a lot of fast forwarding to do - but that's because along with the flashes of awesome, there was a lot of crap on that stage Sunday night too...as usual.  The Grammys people need to get their shit together and get more genuinely talented people on that show and start rewarding that instead of focusing so much on crazy outfits, light shows and smoke and mirrors.

Final Grammy Installment

21 - Adele
Producers - Jim Abbiss, Adele, Paul Epworth, Rick Rubin, Fraser T. Smith, Ryan Tedder & Dan Wilson
Engineers/Mixers - Jim Abbiss, Philip Allen, Beatriz Artola, Ian Dowling, Tom Elmhirst, Greg Fidelman, Dan Parry, Steve Price, Mark Rankin, Andrew Scheps, Fraser T. Smith & Ryan Tedder
Master Engineer - Tom Coyne
Nominated - Album of the Year

I finally got around to listening to this album, mostly so I'd know what they are rewarding when they hand her the Grammy.  I will not argue that Adele has a beautiful voice and a knack for writing songs.  The arrangements are pleasant and each song has a unique sound which is always good.  But here's the thing (you could tell this was coming, right?) it's just not really my cup of tea.  By no means am I saying this is a bad record, quite the contrary.  When I listen to it, I know it's good, but it just doesn't get to me.  Don't get me wrong, I love "Rolling in the Deep" - that song is all over me, but that's really the only one.  My test of the awesomeness of an album is how many songs on it compel me to skip back and listen to them again.  "Rolling in the Deep" is the only song on this record that I want to listen to multiple times in a row.  It's not her fault though, few and far between are the female musicians who can keep me rapt for an entire album (read: Joni Mitchell, Alanis Morissette, Amy Winehouse, Shirley Manson, Paula Kelley, Lita Ford, and...that's about it). 

That being said though, I still believe this is going to be the album that takes the big Grammy. 


Doo-Wops & Hooligans - Bruno Mars

Featured Artists - B.o.B, Cee Lo Green & Damian Marley

Producers - Dwayne"Supa Dups" Chin-Quee, Needlz & The Smeezingtons

Engineers/Mixers - Ari Levine & Manny Marroquin
Mastering Engineer - Stephen Marcussen

However, if I was handing out the Grammy, this is the album it would go to (of the ones nominated, that is)...well, this or Wasting Light, I haven't decided.  This one came out in October, 2010 and I got it sometime the middle of December and I have played the shit out of it.  It's just really good.  I love his voice, I love the catchy upbeat songs, I love the ballads, the whole thing.  It gets to me and that's all I ask from the music I listen to.  "Runaway Baby" and "The Lazy Song" are fun songs to sing along with, "Our First Time" is a groovy little sexy time song, and "Talking to the Moon" makes me cry every. Single. Time.  "Just the Way You Are" is the only song on this record that I'm not inclined to listen to over and over.  I could seriously listen to "Liquor Store Blues" ten times in a row nad be perfectly happy (and it features Damian Marley - awesome!) Needless to say, I was pretty happy to see this one show up on the list of nominations.  Sadly, I don't think it stands a chance against Adele (but you'll probably hear me cheering at your house if Bruno or Foo Fighters take this category!)

More Grammy Nominees

"All of the Lights" - Kanye West, Rihanna, Kid Cudi & Fergie
Songwriters - Jeff Bhasker, Malik Jones, Warren Trotter & Kanye West
Nominated - Song of the Year
All I really have to say about this song being nominated for a Grammy is...what the hell?  First of all, let me say that I'm not a huge fan of Kayne West.  I think he is totally full of shit and largely overrated (except for that moment when he took that microphone out of Taylor Swift's hand...I really liked him right then).  Sure, he's done a couple tolerable songs, but by and large I think I just don't get it.  This is just another one of those songs for me.  It just sounds like any other hip hop song and just blends in with all the rest of them.  I just want to know what makes this one special because I'm not hearing it.

"Holocene" - Bon Iver
Songwriter/Producer - Justin Vernon
Engineers/Mixers - Brian Joseph & Justin Vernon
Nominated - Record of the Year & Song of the Year
At least with this song, I can hear the artistry.  I get why people are impressed by the carefully crafted sound of this song.  The vocal is unique, the arrangement is intricate and full.  It has all the elements that a great song should have.  Here's my problem with it: I don't like it.  I can't help it, I just don't enjoy it.  I've listened to it several times and it just isn't getting in.  It leaves me flat.  I don't find the vocal entirely pleasant to listen to, the arrangement is a bit too contrived, it just doesn't move me.  So what it boils down to is that I can appreciate it, but I don't love it.

"Rolling in the Deep" - Adele
Songwriters - Adele Adkins & Paul Epworth
Producer - Paul Epworth
Engineers/Mixers - Paul Epworth & Mark Rankin
Nominated - Record of the Year & Song of the Year
By now we all know that Adele has a beautiful voice.  It is a powerful instrument and she wields it with uncanny control.  If you don't feel anything when you hear her sing, you really should check your pulse.  This song has everything it needs - her voice, a story of loving and losing, a powerful beat and a tambourine!  Personally, I think Adele is going to clean up at the Grammys this year.  I just hope she can leave room for Bruno Mars to grab one.

Grammy Nominee #1

Song: Grenade
Artist: Bruno Mars
Album: Doo-Wops & Hooligans
Nominated For: Song of the Year & Record of the Year

"Grenade" was the second single off Bruno Mars' smash hit Doo-Wops & Hooligans.  It's a heart breaking song about unrequited love.  Or at least, she's not giving it back at the same level that he's offering it.  He goes into pretty graphic detail about the physical torturers he would endure to prove his love to her.  "Catch a grenade...throw my hand on a blade...take a bullet straight through my brain."  What more could a girl want??  Of course, a man who is actually alive is always a plus...

Either way, this is the song that made me a Bruno Mars fan and convinced me to buy his album.  I could do without the first single "Just the Way You Are" - it's just too sugary for me.  Gives me a cavity.  This one is over-the-top with the romantic gestures too, but for some reason it doesn't annoy me.  Perhaps that's because of witty lyrics like, "tell the devil I said 'hey' when you get back to where you're from".  I love shit like that.

This is really a pretty perfect little pop song and I'm not mad about it being nominated for a Grammy at all.  Bruno Mars' voice is smooth and controlled and never does anything unpleasant.  The song has a steady upbeat tempo along with achingly sincere lyrics about total destruction of the heart - which is one of my favorite combinations!

Grammy Nominations

In the coming weeks (I'll have to work out a schedule, cause I'm weird like that), I'm going to give my opinions on some of this year's nominees.

Album of the Year:
Bruno Mars - Doo-Wops & Hooligans
Adele - 21
(I reviewed Foo Fighters - Wasting Light a while ago)
I'm not doing Lady Gaga's album or Rihanna's because I don't own either of them and I don't care to.

Record of the Year:
Adele - Rolling in the Deep
Mumford & Sons - The Cave
Bon Iver - Holocene
Bruno Mars - Grenade
Katy Perry - Firework

Song of the Year:
All of the Lights - Kanye West, Rihanna, Kid Cudi & Fergie
The Cave - Mumford & Sons
Grenade - Bruno Mars
Holocene - Bon Iver
Rolling in the Deep - Adele

Obviously I'll only do the duplicates once.  Then, after the Grammy's I'll bitch about discuss the winners and losers - it'll be fun!